Sunday, November 30, 2008
The Unexpected Farm
Adrian's cold from a few weeks ago finally caught up with me so I spent the long holiday weekend feeling miserable and whiny. By Sunday I was starting to feel a bit better so I spent the day finishing up my BJP page for November while curled up on the sofa and enjoying a Harry Potter movie marathon. I finished sewing the backing on the piece by the time Harry had defeated the dementors, rescued Sirius and rode off on his Firebolt.It seems as if my November page took a very long time to complete. Probably because it's sort of an extension of my beading in October or I should say my lack of beading in October. I was in a terrible blue funk for the entire month, depressed and stressed over the cost of groceries, the economy, the impending election and a whole list other things. I started and abandoned three separate pieces of beading. I desperately struggled to bead about the autumn landscape in October, something that usually brings me great joy. It's my favorite month here in Minnesota and I usually spend it camping and hiking and enjoying the gorgeous fall colors. But my heart was just not into beading about it and by the end of the month I decided to put October's beading away for a while and get a fresh start on November. With the election over, I began to think more positively about the future and I was able to shake the gloom and anxiety that I felt in October. For my November BJP page, I wanted to bead about the farmlands of Minnesota. I was thinking about the harvest and Thanksgiving and gratitude for all that the land provides for us. I envisioned beading a stark oak tree with rows of fields behind it. I wanted to convey a sense of closure of the growing season. So I began my beading and guess what? The piece fell totally flat. It was boring and ugly and I hated it. At this point I began to panic and I was worried that I'd never be able bead anything again and that I'd have to hang my picture in the BJP hall of shame. I know, I can be a total drama queen, but it thankfully doesn't last very long. So I took a deep breath and bravely started over. I laid one bead down, and then the next one and the next one. Before I knew it, my piece was coming together in a most unexpected way. It looked absolutely nothing like what I'd imagined and it seemingly had nothing to do with farmlands or harvest or anything that I had originally intended. But I liked it anyway and I kept at it, adding row after row of beads until one day I glanced at the almost completed piece and there before my eyes emerged something totally and completely unexpected:A crazy, funky beady farm! I saw beady rows of crops and beady barns and strange shiny silos and beady rows of trees. I saw bee hives surrounded by clover, a crazy round chicken coop and apple trees heavy with fruit. It was a birds eye view of a busy little farm! Okay, so maybe it's a farm that you'd see after walking through a field of poppies on your way to Oz, but it's my farm and I love it. It's the farm that I will one day live on and it makes me insanely happy. This crazy funky unexpected farm may not represent any farm that you'd see in real life, it's more like a landscape from my imagination. It's a place that builds and nurtures and grows for the future. A place where you can be thankful and smile with gratitude for all of the wonderful unexpected joys that life brings.